I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
she told me i tasted like america
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
