if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
there was a trapeze. enough said
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
