My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
