You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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