His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I see more hoeing in ur future
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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