K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
