What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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