All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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