We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Randomize
