After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
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