you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
