My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
