i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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