summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
this hospital has no fireball
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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