Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
