last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
