There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
