He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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