fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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