she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize