U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
