i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
