Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
