but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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