Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
