I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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