I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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