You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
