i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Randomize
