I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
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