I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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