We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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