ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
