Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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