Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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