How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
