i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
accomplished twins. life is a go
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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