i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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