Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
