it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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