And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize