i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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