My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
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