i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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