Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
