shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
