She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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