Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
