Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
