She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize