i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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