no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
